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Breaking The Barrier Between Dads And Child Support

Mention Wyoming, and some might see the cowboy astride a horse, surveying his herd's home on the sprawling range. Mention "Father Factor" to folks in the heart of cattle country, Cheyenne, and you may evoke an image of similar magnitude: Damion - a noncustodial dad whose inspirational efforts drive a distinctive partnership that promotes fathers' involvement in their children's lives.

Aldana has spearheaded a collaboration between a fatherhood group and the Wyoming child support enforcement agency - a relationship that's "breaking the barrier between dads and child support," declares Brenda Lyttle, Director of Wyoming's Child Support Enforcement Program.

In his position as Head Start Family and Community Coordinator in Laramie County, Aldana runs Father Factor, a group that's grown from eight young noncustodial dads in 2003 (then-called the Young Fatherhood Initiative under the Wyoming Health Council), to 50 whose experiences and ages vary. Its mission is "to support fathers in any situation," says Aldana, including custodial and noncustodial, as well as single fathers raising children alone. Most learned about the program from the Laramie County Head Start and through word-of-mouth.

Three groups meet for six-week sessions to talk about "coping with the struggles of fatherhood." In addition, three family events each session serve to unify the fathers with others involved in their children's lives. The goal, says Aldana, is that "no matter what the situation, parents work together as a team."

"A lot of the magic is that dads are talking to each other in a free way," says Lyttle. At the same time, Aldana encourages positive communication with their child's mother. One member is a military dad who married the mother of his daughter before he left for Iraq. He thanked Aldana for the education and support he received from his participation in Father Factor that helped him make that decision.

Other members include a grandfather with full custody, a stay-at-home dad referred to child care so he can attend school, and a single dad who is asking how he can get child support.

Aldana is filling a gap, says one member, by offering help to single dads. The 6-foot-plus, nurturing father of a 2-year-old son also may be changing a stereotype, suggests another member: "I'm learning that it's OK to be loving, and not just a tough guy, which is the way I was raised. ... I've been told it takes four generations to turn around abuse in a family; my goal is to be generation number four."

Director Lyttle was first introduced to Father Factor last fall when Aldana invited her to help with the group's initial family event under his direction. Interest there led to participation in a winter workshop, as well as a third event in March co-sponsored with a local church.

Lyttle says she's getting to know some of the dads on a first-name basis, leading to a relationship that "Damion and I have been striving for. ... I wanted to become their friend first." Now that she has their trust, says Lyttle, "Damion has invited me to speak with them about paternity establishment and the rights and responsibilities that go along with paternity," and later about the importance of paying child support.

Lyttle believes that Aldana is the reason the Cheyenne group is so successful, insisting "he's got a gift" that's drawn more and more people. "He's very masculine and smart and full of inner character and strength; I think the other dads see that in him."

Aldana returns the compliment: "I told Brenda she inspires me because I see her energy," noting the events at which she helped kids in a bike race or brought materials to let them make crafts. "This is what community work is about-hands on."

Looking ahead, Aldana hopes to keep in touch with the dads after their sessions end. He envisions a center in the future where dads can enjoy mutual support, while the kids enjoy an activity room; a place where professionals can train the dads "so they can be successful in the community. ... If we can't be role models, then we're not good for kids."

And he expects that Father Factor members will one day become its facilitators-not such a stretch of the imagination for one who is breaking barriers.

Our Denver child support lawyers know and understand your worries and fears. Let them help you to take control. Contact one of our Denver child support lawyers today for a free evaluation of your case.

	Did You Know?
	A parent can order the other parent to pay child support even if they were never married. Child supporty is payable from one parent to the other for a common chi ld, regardless of the marital status of the parents. This is very common in a paternity action, whether or not the issues of parantage, child visitation, child custody, and child support are resolved.